Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why does the girl continue to cry repetently everyday? Because she found out she was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

who's a knob,a liar, and systematically ruining a once well-run family football club by employing crooks , buying footballers who are well-passed there sell-out date and getting the team relegated ? steve kean not laughing ? nor are 23 ,000 others

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the little girl cry? The little girl cried for mercy as her attackers violated every inch of her innocent body, tearing her up from the inside until her organs were forced out of her anus and blood squirted from her ears as the pressure inside her body exceeded to a maximum. After the attackers were done with the corpse, they cut off her limbs and stapled them to her head.They placed her now decomposing body on the front porch of the worried parents' house and rang the doorbell.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

"Knock knock," "Who's there?" "Black man," "Black man who?" "Gimme yo money!"

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area. He stops for lunch and heads home.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

thumb_up thumb_down -29

what do u say to a girl after you have sex with her? i like cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What is the most dangerous place to be right now? Rodney Kings pool.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What device will find furniture in a poorly lit room every time? An infrared camera.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A lil girl walks in to a bar........................ all a sudden a giant purple bunny jump up into her butt... now every time she poops its an easter egg hunt. LBall

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Knock Knock Who's there? Ben, you just called me. Aren't we supposed to go jogging. Oh yea, I lost track of time. Is it cold out? Yea it is. You should bring a jacket. Alright, can you get me a water? Yea, no problem. Thankyou.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why couldnt the girl ride her bike? becuase she was dreaming she actually doesnt have a bike her family is poor in these hard economic times.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends but you can't wipe your friends on the couch.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Three irishmen walk into a bar...every day, and then stay until it closes.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why didn't the disabled kid cross the road? He didn't make it.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What is white and square? A ping pong block

thumb_up thumb_down -31

*insert corny "a man walks into a bar" joke here*

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops