What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? You don't have to cook an onion to eat it.

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Why was Joe afraid of Steve? Because Steve raped and killed all of Joe's three children two weeks ago.

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The turd said crazy turd so many cows have ninety two ears and it walked away to the store and drank doors while juggling feces and racist jack-o-lanterns.

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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When life hands you melons it means you're dyslexic.

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Two parrots were sitting next to each other. One parrot said "hey" The other parrot replied "hey" therefore making the first parrot say "hey" which made the other parrot say "hey" again making the... this conversation, comprised of just one word lasted a very long time. aproximately 16749 hours.

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? not your cheese, you probably stole it.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a brick at him.

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because he wanted to. Problem, AntiJoke community?

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What do retards eat for lunch? Grilled Cheese

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

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What happens when you cross a porcupine, a beaver, a duck, a go-cart, a dinosaur, a star, a cheap "Big 'n Beey" bathroom, and the cookie monster? Justin Bieber. XD

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Why do you want to know? And what did the censor get? Okay okay you are not boring nor stale nor anything, please increase the effect of this thing, its not working very well when I try to.

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why didnt the whiteperson sit down at obama's election? because he had hemorrhoids

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Boy: Hey girl see these arms? They are just dying to be wrapped around you! She stabs him dead End of story

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Knock, knock Who's there? Landlord; you've been evicted.

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Person: kk Person1: did you just kk me? Person: no

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1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

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Jack just got his new yellow bicycle. His dad got it for his 12th anniversary. Jack was ecstatic to ride it down his street for the first time. He immediately called his friends Paul and Erick and went for his first ride. The neighbors were in AWE when they saw Jack taking off on his new ride. That day the three friends had one of the best day of their young lives, they went up to the lake, had some peanut ice cream and made fun of Alexia. Jack was in love with his new bike and euphoric that they were reunited and did all their favorite things with an incredible amount of passion. Erick hated his new bike.

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whenever you come out of emma browns bedroom

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Why didn't the teenager go to high school? He was murdered

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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How many gay people does it take to make a football team? 11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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