What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

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Q: What do you call a man with a spade in his head? A: An ambulance.

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

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Oh please! Come on! Those that got to us where mostly Russians remember? And what where my parents? (if you do not know you might have guessed it by now) I found a guy that looked about the same as me, messed him up and put my jacket on him, I do not die that easily. Anyway, id explain more, but I have been without these fucking painkillers so long that I am talking trash on this stupid site again... Seriously the pain I am used to, but this addiction on painkillers is a bitch... (shedog if censor got a hold on it) But it turns out I cant sleep without them, sleep just does not come anymore, so Ill go get some now. Who are you by the way? I am Nero7, Aka Axel Knight.

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Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? You take your boots of before jumping on the trampoline!!!!!!!!!

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What do you call a black prostetut with braces. A black and decker pecker wrecker

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A hill billy went fishing

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What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

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What happens when you run over a black man? It is most likely that he is killed.

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What is worse then losing your remote? Falling off a cliff landing on a sharp rock and dying slowly.

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color? Green.

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A man with Azheim - Eh, I forgot what it was called.

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Why did Suzie fall off the Swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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What song did Buddy the elf sing for Santa on his birthday? Happy birthday

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What's up? Well it all depends on your current position, if you are in the center of the Earth then everything would be up. In space there is no gravity so nothing is up. If you don't understand this the sky is up.

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Why did the girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

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why did the clown fall of the swing? he got shot in the head

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A: Do you like it B: No

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whats black and white and red all over? ...a nun in a blender

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what did one elephant say to the other one? nothing silly elepehants dont talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops