What's blue and screams when you look at it Idk that's why I'm asking you

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family how do you kill the plumbers family with a wrench

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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Q:What type of cheese isn't yours? A:NACHO CHEESE!!!!!!!!!

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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There was a mexican and a african in a car, who was driving? The cop, because both of these men are rapists.

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what's black? a lot of things.

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Hair

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a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and they cut his head off

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Q. how many Americans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? A. usually it only takes one, but if the ladders is unsteady he might need one or two friends to help hold the ladder

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A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

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Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

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What's worse than forgetting how to spell? asghasonbma.

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

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how do you refer to a guy with a backwards baseball cap and leather jacket and low riding? by his first name

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...Jack Vale

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What's better than nailing a baby into the wall? Football.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are being pursued by the cops. They run into an old barn for a place to hide. They each hid in a different potato sack. The cops enter the barn, and seeing no one, leave and continue the search somewhere else. The three girls flee the country and give up their life of crime. The cops later go get some donuts.

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Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

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Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

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Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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A baby seal walks into a club

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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