Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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Roses are red. Waffles are blue. Blue Waffle.

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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Q: What's the worst part about having sex with a cougar? A: Dying...

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What did the black kid get on his report card? Math: C- English: D+ Social Studies: C+ Gym:A+ Science: D- N.P.P.

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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Whats the difference between the Taliban and a Football Team? I'm not on the football team.

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So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

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What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

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What's worse than stepping on a piece of gum? A clown following you around all day throwing toothbrushes at you. ___ Zertop™

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what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

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Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your family is dead.

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Roses are red, Potatoes are yellow, ERMAHHHGERDDD PERRDERRRDERRR

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Why did Kristi drop her chap-stick? Kristi was of the many children held in hostage of the Jewish heritage during the times of Hitler's wrath. At the Concentration camps they were not given the opportunity to maintain a healthy, average diet thus decreasing her body strength. No longer could Kristi hold her chap-stick - alas her frail little fingers slowly released the cylinder shaped tube and hopelessly watched it hit the ground. As it hit the ground, a cloud of dust swept over Kristi's body. At the same time Kristi was taking a big whiff of fresh air (just kidding, the air at concentration camps were not fresh - it reeked of acid) she accidentally inhaled the dirt which fled through her body and made her faint. She woke up and it was a dream, lol.

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There were two friends, a girl and a boy. The girl had a ribbon tied to her neck, and every day the boy asked her why, yet she'd never tell him. They grew up together, and fell in love and still, she wouldn't tell him why she had the ribbon on her neck. They got married, and grew old, and still she wouldn't tell him. But one day, she said to him 'I'll show you why I keep this on my neck' and she took it off and her head fell off.

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A young baby died.

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What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops