A guy walks into a bar. No one notices he has epilepsy.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

When a fat lady walks by what do u think? R u fat or pregnant

thumb_up thumb_down +9

You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the little boy refuse to kiss his grandmother? He was afraid she would slip him some tongue.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Father Time and Mother Nature did the nasty, and had a kid called humanity. It had down syndrome. Very sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Easter? A: Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you make an ugly person not ugly? Put a bag over their head. With,, a smiley face.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's worse that tripping over on your way home from work? Finding your entire family murdered

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How many dead babies can you fit in a telephone booth? Mmm, strange question for my HSC maths exam...

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yo momma is So Fat? And isn't your cousin Chow Yun Fat? I think I know some of the Fat family. How are they all doing?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: What did one muffin say to another? A: Nothing. Muffins don't talk, you idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why is Megan Fox so hot? Because the air conditioning broke.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the gay kid in high school say? I'm straight.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A wise man once said...... I am a wise man

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q.what do you call a dead baby? A. a dead baby

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops