Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

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why did amelia earhart get lost? because she was a woman

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Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

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A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

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What do you get when you cross a blonde with a dinosaur? Beastiality

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

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well now

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How did the Holocaust start? Hitler threw a penny into the oven

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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Why did the Fly die? Cause it died the average life span is 30 days.

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What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

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What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's white and sticky? A stick painted white.

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Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

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Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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