A man walks into a room with a sly grin on his face, "Tom, have I got a joke to tell YOU!" Tom hurriedly shoos Susie into her bedroom and tells her to lock the door and not open it no matter what. Tom turns to the man, "I've told you twice before to never come back here, I'm beginning to think that you probably don't take what I say very seriously because you might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something in your head, or maybe you're obsessed with my family or something!" The man hangs his head in shame and agrees with Tom, but Tom still had to do something about the intruder so he called the cops. The cops took him to get psychologically analyzed, but Tom didn't know this because he only cared that his daughter Susie was safe and he also doesn't have access to the testing facility's records. Tom is an only father.

Why was the deaf boy crying at Christmas? He got an iPod.

Whats the funniest part about 911? Over 1,000 People Died

what do you call a black doctor ? a doctor moron

Yo mama so fat she was diagnosed with diabetes and now has to regulate her daily intake of foods.

What did the baby said to her mother? Nothing because she aborted him

Life is like a box of chocolates, It doesn't last too long for fat people.

Tim: Jason, your dumb Jason: No I'm not.

Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners.

Jeff was a very hard working accountant, after a very long day he drove to burger king, he looked up at the menu and said to the lady. I'll have a burger please.

Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

Why did the baby cross the street? It was stapled to the chicken

What's the last thing that went through John F Kennedy's head? a bullet

What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

Cracked.com the only (depressive) "humor" site.

Tia is a dumb website. Turn 0ff blah

Why did Jack and Jill fall down the hill? Because they were donuts

Q: what do you call an icy road? A: dangerous

What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

What's the difference between blacks and whites? The skin color

How do you make a clown stop smiling? You kill his family.

whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

An antijoke

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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