Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.The chicken was very distressed and trying to get away from the angry mob that followed close behind it.The chicken was never seen again. If you see a distressed chicken please contact your local police station.

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

A black man and a white women are having dinner at a fanncy resteraunt. The waitor asks "Who is the better tipper... I know and hands the check to the white women.

What do you call a joke with no punchline?

How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

Why did the black man drown? Because he grew up in a poor neighborhood, where no one had a pool, and so he never learned how to swim

Why did it take the rabbit so long to enter the rabbithole? Because he was hit by a truck and lost a lot of blood.

Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

What's worse than getting no presents for Christmas? Ass-rape!

What's puby and dandruffy? Aodhan Hearty

A man walks into a vagina. The man, expecting a holiday inn, is very confused, and later gets mauled by five bears, who mistook his scent for a fish.

A blonde fails an exam because she did not study

Why did billy go to the beach? To spread his moms ashes on the sand.

Oh look, a dead guy. He must have died

wanna know the biggest joke on antijoke.com? People's spelling.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

Old Macdonald had dyslexia IE IE O

the man walk in to the shop and brought a pet nothing

What rhymes with car? Not kangaroo

Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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