Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar mans asks ''so, what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk.

What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's white and sticky? A stick painted white.

HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

Whats pink and silver and runs into walls? A baby with forks in its eyes. Whats green and silver and sits in a corner? The same baby three weeks later.

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are pink Daisys are white

Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

Knock, Knock Come in

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

Its linked with the process of extracting uranium isotopes, but lets change the subject, with that said, I hope you can help me with some management advice such as the one you gave me, I will of course pay you.

Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

Why did the sailor fall off the boat? Because vampires arent real.

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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