Two penguins walk are in the bathtub and says "can you pass me the soap?" the other one looks at him quite quarly and says "what do you think i am, a chainsaw?!?"

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A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

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Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

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Q: How do you fit 30 Jews in one car? A: Two in the front, two in the back, and the rest in the ash tray.

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Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

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Why black people are so good at football? Because they have white feet.

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What do pancakes and Smokie Bear have in common? They both don't have aids

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What do Whitney Houston and Selena Gomez have in common? They are both dead. Exept for Selena Gomez..

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Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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I have a phone, Don't know where it's at, Forever Alone FAPFAPFAP

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Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

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How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

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Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

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What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

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What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

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- have you heard about the guy who got the left side off the body cut off? - no. - He died

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How do you post a Tasmanian devil? Recorded Delivery

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Yo momma's so stupid she comes up in a lot of jokes titled "yo momma jokes"

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What would the Swatch be called if it was made by a Croatian company? A Crwatch.

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot you racist S.O.B.

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Once i tried to do math ! She wasn't getting wet so i stopped!

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Why did the mexican buy 50 tacos? Because he was taking them to the orphanage where he grew up. Isn't that nice?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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