Why did the snowman melt? It got tired of everyday life and decided that it would be best if he disappeared from society... His name was Dave...

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what was the first thing Barack Obama said to the people of america? ... hi

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WHat is the one thing an alcoholic needs everyday? Rehab.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

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youre gay

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62

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Q: How many vaginas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Just one.

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A bear walks into a bar. Mauls every one in it, then is shot to death by animal control.

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Carlton

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What happened when a gay man asked a straight man what time it was? He told him the correct time, they parted ways and went about with their lives.

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Me: so Megan did it hurt Megan fox: did what hurt? Me: when ur aged face wasn't good enough for the new transformers movie?

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There were a boy with cancer, and when a said "were" is because he is dead now

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

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Yo Momma's sooo fat that the speed of light at her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s.

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8=>

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Wana hear something dirty? Mud

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Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

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Why did man push another man off of a building? Because he is a homocidal maniac and should be in federal prison

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whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

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There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. Then he woke with a fright In the middle of the night And thought about what a strange dream he was having.

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Knock Knock Come in!

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cc

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Scott

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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