- Anti Joke

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

5 Jewish men walk into a bar and are expected to be treated nicely

A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

Roses are read violets are blue i ate a fetus now you die to

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who practices the Jewish religion. A pizza is an italian dish consisting of dough, cheese, and tomato sauce.

There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

A black man and a hispanic man are in a car. Who is driving? The guy who didn't call shotgun.

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

why are you going to laugh at this its reallly dumb

Knock Knock........wait there cars gone, I'll come back later

You do realize that in my home dimension of earth, I am just lying in the sun, typing on the goddamn laptop right? I mean are you retarded OR SOMETHING? I AM THE GODDAMN MORAL MAN! Moral: Honestly though, If I where like running around shouting this, I... Would begin to get slightly worried...

What did the boy eat for lunch? - His mother.

What do you call somebody with no arms or legs and they are stranded in the middle of the ocean? Answer: screwed

just in time?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Q:why did i cross the road A: time to get a watch

what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far from its body.

knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

I am black. And i will beat your children. At checkers. They can be the red .