what do you call it when a leopard starts losing its spots? leopard-osy! submitted by: pukey mcshakes

thumb_up thumb_down

Q.Who do you call a lesbian. A.Shhaammmmm

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

roses are red, violets are red, bushes are red, flowers are red, trees are red, my garden is red... HOLY CRAP MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the three-leaf clover say to the four-leaf clover? "FREAK!"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Teacher: Be creative and original! Student A: Teacher, why do you want us to change our monikers? I'm fine the way I am. After all, I'm unique... just like everybody else... Teacher: Why don't I have the brilliant children? Student B: Chance/randomness plays a large part in our everyday lives. Take for example the life of Bob- a paragon for human normality. He gets up in the morning each and every single day to be greeted by an arbitrary occurrence. Although it sometimes serves Bob good, it could also aggrandize his human well of detriment. Teacher, do you want me to continue? Teacher: I retract my earlier statement. Some of the children are brilliant, but most are not. Hence I'm going to say that I have a normal class of students. Student B: Teacher, you didn't answer my last question of which I addressed to you specifically.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

black

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I love you.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why was the boy mad somebody was liking his foot

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Meanwhile, at La'kaneisha's family reunion, they had a great time eating caviar, steamed lobster, and rare bull testicals.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call a black man in an expensive car? A licensed driver.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

95556

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and was forced to prostitute for money, thus resulting in you.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What is the difference between a monkey and a pig? A monkey doesn't snort drugs.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

if this joke was a potato, it would be a good potato

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Police. Your mom is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What did Obama do when he heard of Bin Ladins death? He informed the nation of what had happend.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Q :What do you call a cow running through a field? A: Bob

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Two robots are walking down the street together and walk into a bar. Just kidding, they can't walk because they have Polio.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

What's worse than forgetting how to spell? asghasonbma.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Three men of varying ethnic backgrounds jump off a building and yell different things as they fall to their death. They were all very good friends and neglected to have had a trip sitter watch them take hallucinogenics. The group of school children below the building are traumatized for a good portion of their lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

What did Shakespeare say to the software designer? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Knock knock "Steve I have a door bell."

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops