Timothy started school at an elementary and was in the fourth grade. His teacher was Ms Bradshaw, and he liked his class. One day as he was going into class, Ms Bradshaw asked everybody, "what's worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it?" Timothy raised his hand and said "the holocaust." The teacher went to her desk and pulled out a desert eagle and shot Timothy five times in the face and raped his dead body

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What happens if a black person meets a white person? They shake hands

thumb_up thumb_down -14

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

thumb_up thumb_down -14

He was as tall as a 6 foot 3 tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

knock knock who's there? ketchup ketchup who? better catchup with me!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's the difference between Marvin Gay and George Straight. They are two different people

thumb_up thumb_down -14

bunnies are fluffy just like yo mama

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Where do you find a pile of dead lawyers? In my basement.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the chicken cross the road? He actually planned to visit his family on the other side, but unfortunately he did not look both ways so was involved in a terrible car accident. His family now mourns their loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

whats brown and sticky a stick

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whose your daddy? Not me

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the kid drop his ice-cream? Because he tripped on a dead guy!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What is worse then your car getting hijacked? A 900 pound man eating a Donut.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

thumb_up thumb_down -14

You should put some sand in your vagina to make the crabs feel more at home.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the child say after the priest touched him? Thank you for the ashes Father, have a blessed Lenten season.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's the difference between Jews and pizza? One is an adherent to the religion of Judaism, and the other is a doughy bread topped with tomato sauce and cheese. They share virtually no similarities.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Walt disney Walks Into A Bar, The Bartender says "WOAH ITS WALT DISNEY!"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

i walked into a bar, the bar tender for some reason said get out. the bartender did not realise that i was the #1 criminal in america. but why would he, i was in cuba. ( i was seven at the time)

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why does the cow have spots? Because it was born that way

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why couldnt the man buy food? Because.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops