Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows. Chickens aren't capable of knowing why they do things.

Roses are red, violets are blue Vodka is cheaper that dinner for two.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? People posting the same joke over and over again.

What do you call a mix between a beaver and a mammal? You can't mix beavers and mammals, and even if I had said a platypus that would not have been funny.

Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

Yo mamma is so hairy that she had to shave

i like potatoes But only mashed baked are a little bad they arent tasty. I like food good because food bad can really hurt me

What has two arms, and two legs but cant walk? A Cripple

Tia is a dumb website. Turn 0ff blah

There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

What does a blonde's vagina taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage

Where did little Annie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

A man sees a giant talking frog walk into a store. He later dies due to an overdose of LSD.

to see a bad joke look above

why did the man come out of the closet? because the dark scares him and it smelled like moth balls

AND

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

Knock Knock? WHAT?!?!?

What's brown and sticky? ...poop....and refried beans

Obama

Jews who wear penny loafers...

How do you keep a dog from barking? Kill it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...