Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

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What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

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How many babies does it take to fill a ditch? Six if you pack them in really tight.

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What do you call a school bus full of black people? Not a school bus

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Whats similar between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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What's worse than having but sex and finding out you have aids? Knowing that the person you had sex with was dead

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dyeing.

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Knock Knock Come in.

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Why did the woman die Because she was old

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nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

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What happens when you touch a curling iron to your arm? You get burned.

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France never surrender.

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Whats the difference between Justin Beiber and Polio? Polio was cured.

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yesterday i saw a man walking down the street with no legs. just kidding.

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wat?

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What is worse then failing a test? Cancer

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your spouse is in hospital.

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What did the old man say to his grandson before he kicked the bucket?? "I wonder how far i can kick this bucket..."

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P0P T4Rt

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Who looks like Zach Efron? Shrek.

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A man walks into a room with a sly grin on his face, "Tom, have I got a joke to tell YOU!" Tom hurriedly shoos Susie into her bedroom and tells her to lock the door and not open it no matter what. Tom turns to the man, "I've told you twice before to never come back here, I'm beginning to think that you probably don't take what I say very seriously because you might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something in your head, or maybe you're obsessed with my family or something!" The man hangs his head in shame and agrees with Tom, but Tom still had to do something about the intruder so he called the cops. The cops took him to get psychologically analyzed, but Tom didn't know this because he only cared that his daughter Susie was safe and he also doesn't have access to the testing facility's records. Tom is an only father.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cannibal. Cannibal wh... As the man opened the door, he was eaten. And they lived happily ever after. The end.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was tied to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why couldn't the man walk? He didn't have any legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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