What do you tell a woman with no black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice but you're not an abusive partner.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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How do you drown a blonde? Hold their head under water.

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q. whats worse than finding your girlfriend cheating on you a. the holocaust

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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apple pie.

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The

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Justin Bieber had sex with a woman.

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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A gorilla walks into the DMV to apply for a drivers license. Turns out it was just some guy in a gorilla suit doing a prank. Everybody instantly realized this at the time since gorillas aren't indigenous to the local area. They guy responsible was charged with a small fine for public mischief.

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What did the handicapped boy say to his mother? Nothing, his severe mental retardation impaired his ability to learn the English language.

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What is the difference between Whitney Houston and Elvis. They are dead. And it make people go boo hoo

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I am the sun. You are the moon.

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Womens Sports

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a bus? Because she's dead

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Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

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What is the difference between a dog and a North Korean tank. When I see a dog I think wow, what a cute dog. When I see a North Korean tank I run away screaming, as do many others, and I hope the marines come and save us.

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Why was the black man chasing the little girl? The black man was the adoptive parent of the little girl and they were playing tag.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels part.

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What's worse than a male chauvinist pig? A woman that won't do what she's told.

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Why are young girls better at school than young boys? Because young boys think about young girls.

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CHEEZECAKE

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why did the black man eat two buckets of fried chicken? because he was hungry and he likes fried chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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