What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why do blacks have a little white on their hands? God has always said that everybody has a little good in them.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Were you born yesterday? Because I've got an erection...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats the difference between a black guy and a park bench? well a park bench is an inanimate object that people use to sit on and feed the birds at the park. and a black guy is a living being who is looked down upon in society.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the white supremacist stab the black man? He believed his race to be superior to that of the black man, thus he resorted to violence in order to display his supremacy.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you stop a puppy from barking in the front yard? Put him in the backyard.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

thumb_up thumb_down +8

when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your mama's so fat that we couldn't catch the cancer early and it gave her crippling weight problem. I'm so sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the mountain biker say when he saw a double rainbow? This a very rare occurrence in nature, and I should enjoy this rare phenomenon.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Two men walk into a bar. And they enjoy a good night of drinking beer and playing pinball.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did William go home. His mother called and they were having a potroast

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between a Jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a fireplace while Jews are functioning members of society

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a black man in an expensive car? A licensed driver.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

who farted i did :]

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops