What was wrong with the tree? Nothing

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

Why couldn't the car drive? Because its wheels were made of butter.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

why did the boy drop his icecream? Because he got hit by a boat

what do you do when you see a priest in a bar? tell him that is un richeous and he shall pay for his sins right before you kill him

A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".

why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

Q: What is creepy and stares at you when you sleep A: Me

A: Knock Knock B: I'm sleeping!

What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

How do you start a Mexican parade? You roll a quarter down a hill

Why was the Librarian mad at the laughing kids?? they were laughing cause someone shot her.

A blonde, a brunette, and a ginger all die in a car accident. Their souls all go to heaven. Nevermind, only the blonde, and brunette's souls went to heaven, since everybody knows, gingers don't have souls.

Itookasipasoda

How do you make a clown stop smiling? You kill his family.

I made a friend today. His name is don. He poops burritos. I like burritos.

So - this baby seal walked into a club.

What's the difference between being gay and being homosexual? Nothing really. The two words are synonyms so try can be used interchangeably.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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