What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Two men are talking at a bar. They both order the same drink but are charged different prices. Angered, one of them men confronts the bartender. A fight breaks out and the bartender is seriously injured.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q:What happens to an elephant if he falls from a building with 10 floors? A:He dies

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +25

how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Zach Murfitt has a small Willy!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A straight-A star quarterback was about to throw the game-winning pass during the final game of his school's season. If he got this pass their undefeated record would have been completed for the last 50 years. Before he threw the pass, he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I like your hair

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Andrew Wang getting a girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Murray Harnett Smells like a dirty Burringbar Whore!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

roses are white violets are green if you you sit on santas lap he will stab you

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A scottish man having fun

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Rick Perry.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The Bible

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How did the blonde die? She got slurped up by a 1,000-foot anteater. How did the 1,000-foot anteater die? He got slurped up a 10,000 foot anteatereater. How did the 10,000 foot anteatereater die? It doesn't matter. The Earth just got slurped up by a one-trillion-foot planeteater.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 20 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What would you call a guy with no arms or legs in the water ? Well you would probably call for help, because he would be drowning seeing as how he has no limbs.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

knock knock who's there? the police you are wanted for 5 counts of 1st degree murder.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

thumb_up thumb_down -1

guess what?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as it is capable of. Personally depends on the weight of the wood.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you get when you cross an octopus with a camel? Nothing, inter-species breeding is impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops