What did the handicapped boy say to his mother? Nothing, his severe mental retardation impaired his ability to learn the English language.

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Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

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A straight man walks into a gay bar and is amazed by the amount of fun he has and how cool people can be when you don't judge someone based on sexual preference or your own religious beliefs.

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How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

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What's in there? Get outta there...

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when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

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Whats the difference between two flies? Nothing, they're both flies.

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your fat

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So, a blind man walks into a bar with assistance from his friend. He orders a drink and the bartender complies. He then spills his drunk and then slips in it. He lays on the floor, his head hurting. He cries, knowing he never should've tried to stare at the sun for ten seconds.

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what do you call it when a leopard starts losing its spots? leopard-osy! submitted by: pukey mcshakes

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as it is capable of. Personally depends on the weight of the wood.

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what did the girl say when she got a ring? OHHH look i got a ring!

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How Many Friends Did The Ginger Kid Have? None.

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You.

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Q. What do you call the person that graduated at the bottom of his medical department? A. Doctor

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I love you.

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What's black and white and red all over? An interracial couple in a car crash.

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Yo momma is so fat, she has to wear a large shirt

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GUY 1: Mann, I just got done working out, check out my forearms!!! GUY 2: You only have two silly!!

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Police. Your mom is dead.

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Everyone lies about agreeing to the terms of service... look, I'll do it right now! because i have to click it in order to post the joke.

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So this blonde walks into a library.

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Want to hear a joke? Sorry, you're looking at the wrong website.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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