What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Q How do you make pie. A You cook it

A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

your moms so fat she has kankles

How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

What was Michael Jackson doing at the Dermatologist's office? He was getting a mole on his back examined to be sure it wasn't cancer.

What do you call a black man with a gun? A police officer.

Ya well your momma's so hot...I'd bang her

Why was the legless man out of his wheelchair? He fell down some stairs.

i have aids and a chode

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? The number varies based on the amount of skill and understanding each infant has in using the paintbursh and red paint.

What's the difference between an Asian driver and a Belgian prostitute? Nothing at all: Marie-Edith Yang is proud of her mixed heritage, and earns a decent wage in a relatively clean brothel in the lovely little medieval town of Bruges.

Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

blubber vaginass CC

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Andrew Wang getting a girlfriend.

What's worse than heartbreak? Getting run over by a steamroller.

What’s the difference between Cool and Kool, the way you spell it

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

What do you call a women out of the Kitchen? Nothing because they shouldn't be

a man walked into a bar and said ow

Q:why was the man on a two seated bycicle by himself? A:his wife had recently died and he wasn't ready to let go

Chuck Norris died.

Why couldn't Helen Keller read? She was blind

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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