Cnorris can carry very heavy objects

Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

where do you find a dog with no brain? in its grave.

Why did the young man have a young woman do cart wheels when he was in his tree house watching her do them on the ground? Who knows?He never shared his feelings.

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13.

What did mike Tyson say to the midget? ''Hello'' He's actually a relatively nice man.

how do you torched helen Keller? put her Ina round room and tell her the bathroom is around the corner

A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

what do you call it when a leopard starts losing its spots? leopard-osy! submitted by: pukey mcshakes

What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

What did the man say to the other man? yummmmm

What did charles get his sister for christmas? Nothing, he's dead

What's my favorite color?? I don't have one, i'm a joke you idiot.

Why did the koala fall off the tree? Because it was dead.

Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

What do you call a black man in an expensive car? A licensed driver.

An armed ninja walks into a bank. He is apprehended by the police, whom he tries to attack with a drawn sword, and is promptly shot down in a hail of gunfire causing civilian injuries and rather significant property damage.

What is the difference between a monkey and a pig? A monkey doesn't snort drugs.

Do you know what's funny about the holocaust? Nothing, it was an unspeakably evil act by a deranged man who should never have been given the power to command a nation

How did the old man climb the hill? He didn't.

What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

Three men of varying ethnic backgrounds jump off a building and yell different things as they fall to their death. They were all very good friends and neglected to have had a trip sitter watch them take hallucinogenics. The group of school children below the building are traumatized for a good portion of their lives.

Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...