A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

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What do you call a over weight woman? Fat bitch.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to get some exercise. They were getting terribly overweight.

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sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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What do you get when someone tells you an anti joke? An anti joke.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

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whats white a smells like paint. whtie paint.

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What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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What did the black guy do when he heard sirens? He Ran

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How do you enter a gas station? Through the front door

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what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

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A kid finds a bag of heroine. He is a good Samaritan and asks the nearest junkie if it belonged to him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Rocky was chasing him

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Q: A woman is hit by a motorcycle. Whos fault was it the motorcyclist's or the woman's? A: It was the motorcyclist's fault. He shouldn't of been riding his mortorcycle in the kitchen while she was making my sandwich.

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Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

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Why is the world going to end on 9 December 2014? I don't know why, but IT IS

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why did sally fall off the swings she had no arms knock knock whos there not sally

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Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

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Chick Norris... Enough said

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Go away still nothing to see

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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