A magician was driving down the road and turned into a driveway...

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

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A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar and ask the bartender for a drink, but in response the bartender politely points out that there are probably people in need of their assistance at their respective place of warship.

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What's large and blue? Probably quite a few things.

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That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

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Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

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I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, and so do I.

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your momma is so poor that she is on welfare.

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Hurricane sandy should have been named hurricane snooki because it ruined the jersey shore

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Continents are large islands.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

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911 jokes are just plane wrong

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

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Who are you if you can rub 2 ice cubes to make fire? Chuck Norris

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a mus lim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the mus lim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the mus lim that he's keeping company with a swine, and the mus lim feels offense for the poor horse.

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What's black and white and red all over and can't turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her back

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a dead baby? I take my cleats off when I jump on the trampoline

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what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

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A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was involved in a homicide at the Children's Hospital resulting in death row right away and was involved in the killing of 12 other numbers on last Tuesday.

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What did the grizzly bears have for lunch? Fish and tourists.

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Why did the women sleep in the kitchen. Due to the poverty levels of her area of residence, sub-sahara Africa, she, her 7 children and 3 orphaned nephews lived in one ram shackled room with a corrugated iron roof which served as a multi-purpose kitchen, bedroom, lounge and greeting area.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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