a man paints himself yello shrinks himself and walks into a baber shop then he relizes that the sizers are yello so he gets cut up into shreds and dies. THE END!

Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

A man told another,"You suck." The insulted man finished the sentence,"On juice boxes."

What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

Whats red and crawls up your leg? A homesick abortion.

If you're jumping rope, and both the tires are flat, how much frosting would it take cover the staircase? Rocket!

Why was the white man's girlfriend a whore? Because she engaged in sexual relations with a multitude of other men.

This is not a joke.

why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

One Direction has 12 letters. So does gayyyyyyyyyy. Coincidence? I think not.

What did the man with one eye say to the woman with one leg at 2 p.m? Good afternoon.

your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

Q) What did the farmer say who'd lost his tractor? A) Where's my tractor?

An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

what is long, white, and used almost everywhere? there are a lot of things that fit this description, so it would be highly illogical to make a guess.

Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

An aspiring lawyer walks into a Bar. He will find out if he passed in a few months.

What was so funny about my sister getting raped? Nothing, there's never anything funny about someone getting raped, especially when it is a close friend or family member

How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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