Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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A tall German man and a short Ukrainian woman walk into a pub and sit down for a drink. The German, not wanting to seem rude, asks the Ukrainian how her day has been. The Ukrainian smiles confusedly as she doesn't understand German.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

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Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

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Did you hear about the new XBOX releasing in Mexico. It's called the XBOX JUAN!!!

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How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

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Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

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theres no I in Intelligence a.w. j.p.

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hi michael

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Your mom is so fat that her doctor told her to go on a diet.

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all these jokes are horrible now

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There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

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My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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