Why did the retarted kids head get stuck in the window? It was a very small window

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs Mat

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Six Million Jews.

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what's worse than 10 dead babies in one trash can? 1 baby in ten trash cans

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Why is it hard to see a black man in the night? Because its dark out, and he's BLACK.

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What's worse than rape? Gang rape.

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What would you do for a Klondike Bar? Well I would open the freezer.

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Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

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Son: Mommy can I have some cookies? Mom: Sure, they're on the top shelf! Son: But I don't have any arms! Mom: No arms, no cookies!

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How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

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What do you call a man who has lost both his legs, one arm, and half his eye? Larry

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Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

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What is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite.

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Two elephants in a bathtub, one says, "Pass the soap." The other one says, "No soap. Radio?"

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Chuck Norris will eventually die because he is a human being, just like all of us. His movies weren't very good either.

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Nothing exceedingly odd happened at a bar

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Why couldn't the mentally retarded kid hear? It was too dark.

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What's the difference between Colonel Sanders and a barrel of olives? Colonel Sanders isn't in a barrel.

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Your mom is so fat that her every day life if a struggle and she has to get gastric bypass surgery or else she is going to die

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A horse walks into a bar and asks the bartender "why the long face?" The bartender replies "this is the fourth time this week a horse walked into my bar and every time it happened i have to clean up a bunch of horse pooh!"

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Why did the Jewish man commit suicide? Because he was not happy with his life.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A rather unfortunate physical disability

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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Knock knock? Who's there? Llama. Llama who? Llamas aren't racist unlike that bastard Ann Coulter. That's why they can get a carrot up the ass and she can't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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