Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. At least that's what I've heard, I'm blind.

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How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

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A Jew, a black man and a Christian enter a bar. Black people werent allowed in at the time so he was escorted out. The Jew And Christian have a blast and the time of their lives that night.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

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Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

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Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

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what has 4 legs three eyes and a horn? a:yo mama

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What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

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why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

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CNN has posted that the recent death of osama bin laden is comparable to decapitating a snake when really it is more akin to bisection of a worm.

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How do all Asians look? With their eyes.

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Why did Timmy miss school? He was killed in a tragic school bus accident

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

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A dyslexic blind man walks into the bartender behind the bra

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Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

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Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

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What is the worse joke to tell a Orpahn Knock Knock Whos there not your parents

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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