Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

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What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana you glad I didn't say banana?

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? Because he got hit by a bus.

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Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

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What do you call a black man reading a book? An avid reader that happens to be black

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Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

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Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

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what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

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Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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So, a man walks into a doctor's office. He says, "Doctor, it hurts when I bent my arm like this." The doctor tells the man that it is simply a sprained muscle after thorough examination.

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1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

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What's green, little, and eats rocks? A Little Green Rock-Eater What's green and has a thousand wheels? A lawn, I lied about the wheels! If I were to throw a rock down the a whole in the center of the earth (straight through) what would happen? The Little Green Rock-Eater would eat it!

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A horse walks into the bar. The bartender asks "why the long face" Turns out the horse's family died that evening.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops