a little boy goes down stairs on xmas day he has three presents the first one was a pair of socks the second one was a football and the third one was shin pads the boy was now crying really loud santa is outside laughing why? the boy has no legs

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How do you stop an aboriginal from drowning? Take your foot off his head...

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Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

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why does andy speak when not spoken too because he wants a smack

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What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

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What do you call a black man who lands on the moon? An astronaut...f*cking racist.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Why did the black man jump off of a bridge? -He was in depression and comitted suicide.

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

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Why did the chicken go cluck cluck oh baby yeah balloon your mama oops did kangaroo say? I had sex with your wife and stole your car keys.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at a grocery store? Because I wanna spill some milk on the floor so they can call spill on aisle 9 and I'll be there waiting for you and watch you clean my mess.

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How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb? Obviously more than six because my bass meant is still dark.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

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How can you tell if someone is a virgin? Everyone is a virgin in something. For example, if you never had sex with a dinosaur, then you are a virgin at dinosaur sex.

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How do catch Lady GaGa's attention? Have a Bad Romance

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Roses are red violets are blue. A face like yours belongs in the zoo! But don't you worry I'll be there too! But not in the Ill be laughing at you

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What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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What did the water bottle say to the Itunes gift card Nothing,they're both innament object and don't have mouths.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I don't know how to rhyme Refrigerator ------------

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Roses are red,vilots are blue just wait till I poo and till i kiss you

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Why doesn't a duck's quack echo? Evolution.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops