What do you get when you cross an l with a line? A t.

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-Why Peter is going to mall for buying some beer? -Because he was 18 and he was able to do it.

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there is a man swimming in the ocean with a tree in the ground eating him up so , the cantelope asks the microwave where is the store the microwave says nothing because it is an inanimate object and cannot speak even though the cantelope can which is unfortunate

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What did Obama do when he heard of Bin Ladins death? He informed the nation of what had happend.

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A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says "get out you jew!" The bar tender apparently was a Nazi.

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how do you drown a blonde? chain her to a cinder block and throw her off a bridge.

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What can't think, see, hear, taste, or smell? A Headless Cat

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Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

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A Man visits his Doctor because he is feeling slightly unwell.

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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A bear walks into a bar. Mauls every one in it, then is shot to death by animal control.

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How do you wake Lady GaGa up? set her alarm for a reasonable hour.

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Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

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What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

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I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

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How do you make a chicken laugh. By showing it how to cross the road

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

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how do you get 100 dead babies in a bucket? use a blender. how do you get 100 dead babies out of a blender? Doritio's

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Jess Burns

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How do you make a black man cry? Kill his family

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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