How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None

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An asian kid in a classroom starts to squint to try to see the board that is far away. A white man looks at the kid and asks, "Hey asian, is it hard for you to see that board?" The Asian replies, "Yes, yes it is."

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What is green, ugly and can't empty his bowels without exerting a tremendous amount of energy? A constipated, ugly, green thing.

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What's the difference between being gay and being homosexual? Nothing really. The two words are synonyms so try can be used interchangeably.

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What did the man say to the other man? Nothing, they didn't know each other..

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What's pink and smells like a red rose? A pink rose.

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The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

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Oh hey is your dad good at golf? No, he's not really good at anything except lying.

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

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What do you call a black man with a gun? A police officer.

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whats worse then justin beiber NOTHING

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan.

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whats worse than one bee sting... two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings... the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust... three bee stings

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A straight-A star quarterback was about to throw the game-winning pass during the final game of his school's season. If he got this pass their undefeated record would have been completed for the last 50 years. Before he threw the pass, he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

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Why did the man go to space? He was a highly trained astronaut

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Anti jokes are funny, but also not.

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DERP

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Q: What happened when Timmy divided by zero? A: He got a syntax error.

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Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

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q. whats worse than finding your girlfriend cheating on you a. the holocaust

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What's worse than having but sex and finding out you have aids? Knowing that the person you had sex with was dead

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What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 20 trees.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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