What would you call a guy with no arms or legs in the water ? Well you would probably call for help, because he would be drowning seeing as how he has no limbs.

nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

How Many Blind People Does It Take To Solve A Rubiks Cube? None Their Blind

My cousins so stupid she makes straight A's

roses are read violets are blue u suck and ur gay

Fill in the _________ Ans: Cup Posted By: Lram

Why did the blind kid hit the other kid in the face? He was trying to give him a high-five.

Why did German "shower heads" have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers.

David: Hey dude, I'm so hungry! Jose: Yeah me too David: Wanna get some food? Jose: No, I lied.

Are you from Tennessee? Cause Jamaican me crazy.

Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to see him rocking and rolling on it.:)

What's the difference between a baby and an egg? One is fun to throw at houses and the other is an egg.

What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

Q: What's a fish store with no fish? A: A water store.

Once upon of time an old man goes to a hospital and tells the doctor that he wants to get circumcised for the first time. The doctor says "Are you sure, you are 90 years old" and the old man says "please doc, just do it." So he goes on with the procedure and the old man is very happy. He returns home with his foreskin and keeps it inside a small box. The old man goes out for dinner and comes home to see his foreskin missing. He gets very angry and asked his daughter "Have you seen my little box?" Daughter says no. He asked his son-in-law "Did you take my box with my foreskin?" Son in law says "No, never." The old man asks the dog "Doggie, did you take my foreskin?" The dog says "Why yes, yes I did." The old man angrily says "Well give it back!" The dog says "I will give your foreskin back if you do me one favor." The old man says "What is it?" The dog says "Three blocks down the street there is a purple house with a cute dog that I would like you to bring to me to go on a date with. Bring her to me and I'll give you back the box." So the old man walks three blocks down the street and spots the purple house. He knocks on the door and a woman opens the door. The old man asks "Excuse me ma'am, i just got circumsized yesterday and I was wondering if I can borrow your dog for just one night because my dog some how blackmailed me and kept my foreskin and said that if I can get my dog and your dog together he would give me my foreskin back." The woman replies " Who the FFFFF are you?!!!"

Who's better than badboy? The holocaust.

a rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

Why did Billy fall off the Empire State building? He didn't fall, he jumped. He decided to commit suicide due to his lack of friends, caring parents, low self-esteem, and self-concious issues. Billy really needed a therapist.

A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

What didn't last long? You in the bed

Why did the burglar rob the bank? because he needed money due to the economic decline.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

what did the homeless boy do when he saw a cup of water? threw it in someones face

What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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