What do you call a video game nerd who insists on sitting at home all day not going out or thinking of others except for beating the level or killing the creature or leveling that skill or completely ignoring his civic duties? Accepted

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Q: How do you get a one armed Pollock out of a tree? A: Call the fire department.

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How do you tell if your sister is on her period? Cause your dads dick tastes funny...

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

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What's worse than heartbreak? Getting run over by a steamroller.

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i have aids and a chode

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? About 3:26 PM Eastern Standard Time.

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What do you get if you cross a mexican with a pineapple? Nothing, they are two different physical forms thus incapable of becoming a new object.

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DERP

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What did the handicapped boy say to his mother? Nothing, his severe mental retardation impaired his ability to learn the English language.

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Whats the difference between two flies? Nothing, they're both flies.

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What's in there? Get outta there...

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to see him rocking and rolling on it.:)

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What happens when you touch a curling iron to your arm? You get burned.

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So, a blind man walks into a bar with assistance from his friend. He orders a drink and the bartender complies. He then spills his drunk and then slips in it. He lays on the floor, his head hurting. He cries, knowing he never should've tried to stare at the sun for ten seconds.

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Your mama's so fat that we couldn't catch the cancer early and it gave her crippling weight problem. I'm so sorry.

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

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Have you heard the one about the drunk cleaning lady? I haven't either but I bet it is good. That is a pretty good premise for a joke.

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make me a sandwich!

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What's black and white and red all over? An interracial couple in a car crash.

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Liars go to hell! -God

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It gets very hot in Mianus, Connecticut

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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