How do make a boy cry? You cut off his eyelashes

knock knock. who's there greench greench who greenchicken feathers

what happened to the christian when he died? nothing because god isnt real.

why does renee suk at tetris? i dont know thats why im asking

How do you keep a dog from barking? Kill it.

A drunk guy walks into a bar and falls flat on his back. Upset, he then finds a bathroom. An hour later he is arrested for beating off in the bathroom. off is pressing charges.

A priest, a rabbi, and a preacher walk into a bar. They ordered a water each.

Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After be told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, Chuck walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

Why did Lebron leave Cleveland? It's a terrible place to live.

How do you act when you discover that the 'Submit' button doesn't work? Wait for a while until the problem fixes itself and you are able to perform the desired function.

Chuck Norris died.

Two men walk into a bar. And they enjoy a good night of drinking beer and playing pinball.

Q: whats worse than a worm in an apple? A: being raped by a giant scorpian

"What was the hardest thing about that kid getting killed by that bus." "What?" "My dick"

Female Athletics

So a man walks into a wedding and asks the waiter where the to wait for the punch... the waiter says, "there is no punchline."

a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

your fat

So, a blind man walks into a bar with assistance from his friend. He orders a drink and the bartender complies. He then spills his drunk and then slips in it. He lays on the floor, his head hurting. He cries, knowing he never should've tried to stare at the sun for ten seconds.

Why did German "shower heads" have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

shook hands with Marty ,talked about politics, then walked away.

A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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