What's white and red all over? A baby in a blender

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A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

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knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

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Knock knock! Who's there? Wrong house. I apologize.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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What's worst then not getting anything on Christmas? Rape, Murder, Dying.

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Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We know about the cocaine.

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There are three types of people in this world: The stupid. And the ones that can't count.

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If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

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why does the octopus have no friends? because they're anti social by nature

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What's better than having a baby in your fridge? Almost anything.

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What notes does the tightrope-musician have to worry about? They probably have to concentrate generally harder than the average musician in order to produce any correct, good quality notes.

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

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What's the difference between being gay and being homosexual? Nothing really. The two words are synonyms so try can be used interchangeably.

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Why did suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Whos there NOT SUZY!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to she him rocking and rocking on it.(:

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A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

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Q: What did the hobo get for Christmas? A: Hypothermia.

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So there were two palm trees on an island. The first palm tree says to the second, "Hey! What's up?" The second one replies, "Nothing much, just chilling." Except they were actually ice cubes.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Weird, orange is my favorite color.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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