But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

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What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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A monkfish walks into a bar... The world blew up

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An English ship lands in the New World and offers to trade with the natives. The ship actually carried foreign diseases that the natives had no immunity to, and they all died.

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why was the black guy smelly? because his white friend threw him in a dumpster

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Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her and kill her family.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

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A guy walks into a bar and falls.

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A man walks into a bar, he sits down.

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What's worse than waking up next to an ugly girl? Waking up, sealed in a coffin which is floating on a raft traversing through shark-infested waters. Oh, and the raft is on fire.

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Where did Jimmy go during the bombing? An underground shelter where he would be kept from harm.

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Why was Billy lat to school? He was being raped.

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What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

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Whats white and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A refridgerator

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate you so suck on poo.

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How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

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What do you get when you cross an orange with a gerbil? A mailbox that lights up when you open it

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What's blue and rhymes purple? Get Out

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A woman walked into a bar. Many men laughed at this unthinkable notion because women belong in the kitchen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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