Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human. Actually a perfect circle doesn't exist.

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what is red white and blue? the french flag

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A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

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Why did the man die? A fridge fell on him.

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What do you call kids born in whorehouses? Poor, poor children.

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what do you call an albino brown bear a polar bear

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Bartender: What are you having? Sally: Can I have a martini? Bartender: How do you want it? Sally: I want it tall and black, like my man.

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How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the floor. How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail the other one to the floor.

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Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

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What's worse than finding a holocaust in your apple? A worm.

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What do a priest, a rabbi, and an asian have in common? They all don't know each other.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

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Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

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In Soviet Russia, blonde is smart

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Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

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Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

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I had friends on the Death Star.

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A Jewish man, a christian man, and a buddist man walk in bar, They all have to much to drink and are arrested for driving under the influence while trying to get back home.

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What did the black man get for Christmas? A felony conviction.

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Why did the Triceratops walk into a grocery store? To buy groceries

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Why didn't Johnny have any food left? Because he ate it all.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops