roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

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A cat jumped into a swimming pool It drowned and was cremated.

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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what do you get when you cross a jellyfish, a jar, and a brown crayon? i dont know, im not into genetics, and jars dont have genes.

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2 guys walk into a bar the third one ducked then proceeded homeward where he murdered his whole family by ax

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42

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Girl: What is your phone number? Guy: 1-800-Choke-Dat-Ho

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Inspirational speaker: "You can judge a man by the way he treats those who can do nothing for him." Me: "Hitler loved dogs."

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A man walks into a bar. What does he say? Ouch!

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Mooses

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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What do you call a person without any arm no legs and a eye patch? names

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

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Enters password. Sorry your password must contain the entire alphabet, your left foot, a theme song to a television show, and the blood of your enemies. Enters password. Password Strength: Weak

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A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

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Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

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Hitler walks into a temple..... Oh wait he died

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What makes Amish bread different than regular bread? It's made by Amish people

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Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

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Why did the chicken cross the traffic filled road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? Chicken delivery.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I jack off

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What's annoying and wears glasses? The kid next to you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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