Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What's worse than the holocaust? The Jews.

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WHY WAS 6 AFRAID OF 7? I REALLY DONT KNOW!

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because Osama bin Laden is dead.

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What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

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Why did the boy fail his math test? Because his Mother threw a refrigerator at him.

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What do you call a person who kills there own child? Casey Anthony.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

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Why did the turtle fall out of the car? It forgot to buckle up

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How are a black man and a banana similar? They are both intelligent human beings, except for the banana.

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what did the bannana say to the milk carton. nothing bannanas cant talk and their on the other side of the store

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why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

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how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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A cat walks into a Chinese restaurant. It is then asked to leave.

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Obama stumbles upon a KKK meeting. All the klansmen shake his hand and respect him because he is the President.

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If a hen lays an egg in the middle of a roof, which way would it fall? To the east, as there was a brisk wind in that direction.

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There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The unfortunate child in a pedophile's basement who the police have yet to find.

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What happens when a blind man walking crashes in to man that's talking to his gang ? He wakes up in a ditch

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Whats big, red and will cause severe injuries possibly fatalities if it falls out a tree? A phone box

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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