Q: What's a fish store with no fish? A: A water store.

thumb_up thumb_down -73

If pro is the opposite of con . Is congress the opposite of progress?

thumb_up thumb_down -123

A man walks into a Library and asks for a book on suicide. The Librarian says: "Do you have a library card?" The man says no and applies for one.

thumb_up thumb_down +100

Q: What do you call a midget psychic who escaped from prison? A: His or her name.

thumb_up thumb_down +76

Have you seen Stevie wonder's new mansion? No..... Either has he

thumb_up thumb_down +70

Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and proceeded to have gay sex on the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

thumb_up thumb_down +58

What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating on the water? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

what do you call a black man in a police car? A police officer

thumb_up thumb_down +54

youre gay

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding cancer on your back

thumb_up thumb_down +48

I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one animal there and it was a dog. It was a shitzoo

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a porch? Bob

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A Homosexual, a Jew and a Black walk into a bar. They do not speak make eye contact or acknowledge each other in any way.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's black and white and red all over? A bleeding penguin.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

JUSTIN BEING SMART

thumb_up thumb_down +24

do you want my comeback? its in your mums mouth

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the wannabe mother get for Christmas A miscarriage.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why do asians have such thin eyes? Genetics

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops