What do Gary Glitter and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both successful pop stars

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When life hands you lemons, make lemonade. Well, life isn't a physical being so chances are low that it will actually hand you lemons.

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Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

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God made Coke God made Pepsi God made me, Oh so sexy

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Why did the man sit down? Because he was tired of standing up.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop ? Dr Dre.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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You know what's wrong with Oprah? Generally nothing. She's a well-respected African American woman who happens to be quite wealthy and likes to share her wealth with other people.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The fact that you actually took time to read this cynically hypnotizing answer that you cannot seem to stop reading even though you know that this sentence is just a clever run to show the epitomy of the anti joke. ha-ha.

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What's worse than having to listen a song from Justin Bieber? Being wrongfully convicted of child molestation,rape and murder and spending 50 years in prison before being acquited by DNA-analysis.

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your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

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A man walks into a bar he said oww when did this metel bar get here

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If atheism is a religion, then not collecting stamps is a hobby.

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What do you call six white guys on a bench? Six white guys at the park

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Q:What do you call a cow with no legs? A:A hamburger.

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Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

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Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

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Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

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how do you kill a black guy ? AIDS

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Whats green, furry and it stole christmas? A Robber with a Christmas tree on his back

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What did the lactose intolerant boy say when he accidentally drank some milk? Nothing, he went into anaphylactic shock and couldn't breathe.

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why did the man fall down? because he was shot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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