Q: Why does a zebra have stripes? A: Because Sarah Jessica Parker is a horse.

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What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

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You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

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I gotta friend named Michael Nugyen and he dishonored his family. Did I mention he was asian ( he live in tampa fl )

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Stop screaming! The damn uppercase letters make my head hurt! Let a lady have it for once!

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Knock Knock. (No answer) Knocker: " I guess the resident of this home isn't home at this hour."

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

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anus

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Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

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You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

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There once was a boy walking over a railroad track. He got hit by a train. He died.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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Why did the cave men discover fire? They were the only humans on earth.

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what's the worst way to fall asleep? sad. it makes you lose sleep.

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What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

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Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

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class is canceled. My professor died.

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HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

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Ring Ring! Hello? Hello, is your refrigerator running? Yes it is Good.

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knock knock come in !

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Sandwich.

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An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

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"I saw daddy with mommy last night. I think he was stealing my milk."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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