belly button

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What did Hitler say to Mussolini? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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Why couldn't the girl go to the bathroom? Because she was obese.

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You look like Susan Boyle f**ked Snooki and then got hit by a truck.

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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A man and a woman are having sex. The man finishes and says, "Oh, God, I hope you're on the pill." The girl says she isn't and begins to cry. Lacking a job or a stable life, the man leaves the woman. The woman has an abortion and suffers irreversible damage to her ovaries.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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Whats worse than spilling the milk? Getting raped by the easter bunny.

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Yo Momma is so fat she is at risk of contracting Type 2 Diabetes.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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where is the world?

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E M I L Y L Y N C H B I L L I E J E A N L A R K I N YEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They're both Tom Cruise.

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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What's blue and looks just like water? Water.

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Yeah your point? Anyway, so then the brain surgeon goes: I have have cut into thousands of brains, and never seen a single thought.

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I like my sex how i like my steak Pink and Bloody

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Why did the Wife cheat on her Husband? Because she was a f***ing BITCH.

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Why did kenny the koala fall out of the tree? becuase kenny was dead. Why did kesha the koala fall out of the tree? because she was hit by kenny while he was falling.

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Micheal Jackson walks into a bar

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What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops