roses are red violets are blue i fucked your mom so did you

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whats worse than dropping your toast butter side down ? being ripped apart from the anus upwards by a large black man

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Doctor: Knock knock. Patient: Whose there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor. Patient: Interrupting doc... Doctor: Your son has AIDS and will die soon.

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call me maybe.

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How did Sarah Offet win? He had no arms. Knock, knock? Whose there? Not Sarah Offet

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Q: why was the cat naked? A: its owner was drunk and thought he was shaving his own head.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? Twister

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Why did an asian lawyer commit suicide? Because his wife left him and he hated his miserable life.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a would chuck could chuck wood? Home depot

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every cloud has a silver lining

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You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

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So, two men walk into a bar. But the midget walks under it.

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Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO? A: One is a human while the other is an unidentified flying object.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

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An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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what's the worst way to fall asleep? sad. it makes you lose sleep.

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How dis the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

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HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Sandwich.

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class is canceled. My professor died.

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Why did the cave men discover fire? They were the only humans on earth.

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Ring Ring! Hello? Hello, is your refrigerator running? Yes it is Good.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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