What makes Amish bread different than regular bread? It's made by Amish people

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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How do you kill a deer? You don't, you just let it be because that's what a decent human being would do.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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What's annoying and wears glasses? The kid next to you

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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how do fit 104 jews in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 100 in the ash tray.

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what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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Why did the chicken cross the traffic filled road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? Chicken delivery.

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Enters password. Sorry your password must contain the entire alphabet, your left foot, a theme song to a television show, and the blood of your enemies. Enters password. Password Strength: Weak

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Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

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Hitler walks into a temple..... Oh wait he died

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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(A man goes to visit his neighbor) Knock! Knock! ...................... ................... ................ ............ he walks back home

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I jack off

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What do you call a person without any arm no legs and a eye patch? names

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When Glenn looks in the mirror all he sees is Nicole Sipes.

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In Soviet Russia a lot of people were killed for voicing their opinion against Stalin

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Why did Rachel fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Rachel.

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What's the same about a clown and a knife? They are both fun, except for the clown. I hate clowns.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops