Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a skank.

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How do you get a beautiful woman to go to bed with you? "How?" It's not a joke, it's a legitimate question!

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What did one eye say to the other? Nothing. Because eye's can't talk.

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Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

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Q: what's the difference between a human and a gorilla? A: they can both talk, apart from the gorilla

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What do you call a black man without a job? A man disenfranchised by the failing American economy.

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I got shot, you laughed

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Why did the catholic priest go to jail He was a paedophile

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

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Why was the protester tied to a tree? They were tired of him protesting.

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What do you call a dinosaur with no teeth? He's British

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What do gay horses eat? A combination of straw and legumes, much like heterosexual horses do.

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What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

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What did the police officer say to the boy in the park? your parents were killed in a car accident.

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An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

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What do you get if you cross a mexican with a pineapple? Nothing, they are two different physical forms thus incapable of becoming a new object.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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What's worse then Obama? Nothing

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Why was the mexican dead? Because he overdosed on Methamphetamine.

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roses are red, violets are red, bushes are red, flowers are red, trees are red, my garden is red... HOLY CRAP MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!

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Don't you hate the retarded smart people who think anti-jokes are all about really explaining but adding sarcasm? Yes.

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William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

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how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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