your moms so fat she has kankles

How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

What's the difference between being gay and being homosexual? Nothing really. The two words are synonyms so try can be used interchangeably.

What do you do when you come to a fork in the road? You take it

why did the man come out of the closet? because the dark scares him and it smelled like moth balls

What's black and white and red all over? A bleeding penguin.

Jews who wear penny loafers...

Two Jews walk into a bar. They order martinis and have a wonderful time.

How do you make a baby cry? You leave it unattended

Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to see him rocking and rolling on it.:)

What do you call a mummy that falls into the Nile? Wet

What do you call a dude dinosaur that's into other dude dinosaurs? A Bi-ceritops

What do you call a really bad actor? Nicholas Cage

how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

What's red and green? A frog in a blender!

a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

a man walked into a bar and said ow

Why arnt black people alowed in bars? Because monkeys don't drink beer! DER DA DER.

The Mets win the World Series

You.

Why couldn't Helen Keller read? She was blind

So, a blind man walks into a bar with assistance from his friend. He orders a drink and the bartender complies. He then spills his drunk and then slips in it. He lays on the floor, his head hurting. He cries, knowing he never should've tried to stare at the sun for ten seconds.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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