* Are you afraid of dinosaurs? * No, they're all dead.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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What's worse than dropping you're ice cream? Getting your face mauled off by a German Shepard.

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why was sally the best at hid and go seek they couldn't find her body

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

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Two latino men are drinking at a bar. Suddenly, one man falls off his barstool, unconscious. Later that day, he was diagnosed with pancreatitis, and died never having dealt with his severe alcoholism.

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Yo mamas so fat she is obese

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How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

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What do you get when Justin Bieber mates with a beaver? Nothing, the species are too genetically different to produce offspring

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What happens when a truck full of mexicans and a truck full of aisians collide? They all die.

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How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

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My mother has great posture. She's paralyzed from the neck down.

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Stop reading these anti-jokes and go study for your externals!

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What time is it? If I hadn't poked your eyes out, you might know.

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How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Joe Bereta is a member of al Qaeda.

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

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Q: How do you kill a goblin if the fries are next to the sushi? A: Yes. Walruses have nostrils and rubber chickens don't like microwaves!

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knock knock who's there? A worm, your dead in a coffin.

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a man was hired for a job. he made a lot of money and was able to support his family.

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Your tell your girlfriend to make you a sandwich, she actually makes one for you.

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why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

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1,000 people get out of a plane , who hits the ground first? The DEAD guy!!!!

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i have a black man in my family tree. i am 25% african american among several other ethnicities.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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