roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

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What's the difference between ?2 and and 74^3? ?-405242.585786

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Girl: What's up? Guy: If I told you, would you sit on it?

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The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

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Smeg...

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What did i say to the stupid person? Your Stupid.

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

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Mexicans don't use lightbulbs because they can't afford them.

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Whats funny about a guy with no legs? I bought him a wheelchair.

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Whats worse then dieing and going to hell? Waking up and going to school.

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Do you know what's the sexiest thing in the world? Sex.

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2 gay men walked into a bar, The next day they want back to the bar, They went back on the third day but only 1 man came back out and he was in tears, This was because the other man had a cardiac arrest and died.

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Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

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What did the chicken say to the butcher? Moo.

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One of them says, "Man, it sure is hot in here." and the other muffin replies, "Yep." They later die a horrid and painful death as their flesh gets burned into a nice golden brown crisp.

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A: Who are you? B: A random guy who walked into your house A: Oh sorry, I keep forgetting your name.

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. <>

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Why did the girl need a peice of gum after spending 20 minutes parked in the truck with her boyfriend? Because she had spent the last 20 minutes eating sweets, which she couldnt let her mom know she had eaten because her mom calls her fat everyday even though she only weighs 110 pounds, and forces her to only eat vegetables.

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An orphan walks into a bar. The bartender calls Child Protective Services and is given to a nice foster family.

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Why was billy sad because in the morning he witnessed his mom get stabbed in the throat repeatedly by a clown then he saw the clown in the cop car but his mask was off and it turned out to be billys dad

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mirror mirror on the wall who has the most desire of them all? Matt Daly!

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Why did Susie fall off the monkey bars? She had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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